A few years ago, I hosted a luncheon for a group of female friends. One of my guests wore a lovely twin-set, the height of fashion at the moment. Had she worn it the year before, the fashion police would have pulled her over and given her a ticket. Twin-sets, fashionable in the 40s had been passe for decades.
Twin set: Matching sweater and knit top, frequently worn with a string of pearls. Murder mystery writers often dressed the spinsters who lived in the cottage at the bottom of the lane in twin-sets and sturdy tweed skirts.
Who are they? Those folk that decide what is in or out of fashion? Why do we listen to them? More importantly why do we buy what they foist on us? The most effective way to quash the tyranny of fashion is to boycott whatever offends. Vote with your wallet, ladies.
Take platform stilettos designed – in the short run to break ankles, and in the long run to ruin your back for a lifetime. We couldn’t wait to grow up when we tottered around in our mother’s heels. Now we totter around in our own on which we spent too much money, especially for something that causes personal harm.
Take see-through clothing – designed to cover you modestly, until you move, then the bits that were hidden are exposed, life imitating the art of fashion.
Take winter boots – that are incapable of protecting the wearer from anything inclement, because they were designed for show not showers.
My personal fashion weakness are handbags. [You can't criticize if you haven't sinned is the theme of a homily I write in my head while riding buses.] If I had the funds, my handbag collection would require a walk-in closet of its own. Handbags are victims of fashion tyranny and really bad taste. Current trends add chains and studs and all manner of unnecessary hardware, so that the carrier looks like a porter for a medieval torturer. Everyone of those hard-edged adornments can run a stocking, rip a blouse or snag a skirt, while at rest on a lap. Why do we buy $200 bags to ruin our $300 wardrobes, not just visually but literally?
Form follow function…please…in fashion.

